Disapproval, disappointment, and then, discouragement???

Have you ever gotten the 3 D's???  Disapproval.  Disappointment.  Discouragement.

First you receive disapproval of something that meant a lot to you personally, then you experience disappointment due to the outcome and finally you become discouraged and just want to give up.
Does that ever happen to you?

Well, it does to me.  This is a bit of a long blog, so if you don't have time to read it now, put it aside and read it later.....

It is so interesting to watch events unfold that you never dreamed would happen.
Let me give you an example.  This past week at my job, I was called into the clinical manager's office to notify me that someone in our office had a grievance with me.  Whaaat???  A grievance?  For what?  Well, it was for visiting patients in our nursing homes for hospice.  As a marketer for Hospice, my job is to call on the director of nursing, social workers and activity coordinators to get to know them and develop rapport with them.  Each visit, I try to develop a little more of a relationship with one of these key contacts so that they will feel comfortable with me and our company enough to trust us with their patients who might need our assistance with pain and symptom management, end of life issues, etc.

Well, as part of my rounds each week, I stop in to say hello to the patients we currently have on our service.  Just to say hello and see how they are feeling.  I openly tell the patient that I am not a nurse, social worker or chaplain, just a plain old marketer.  We visit for maybe 5-10 minutes and sometimes I leave what I call a "Sunshine" basket of snacks, treats, hand-sanitizer, kleenex, etc.  Pretty innocent, right?  Well, not according to one of our staff.

For over a month now, different nurses, aides, and/or social workers for our office have noticed that I have been visiting our patients in facilities.  Does anyone ask me why I am visiting - what is the purpose of my visit?  No.  Not one person.  Instead, it comes up at a clinical staff meeting as an objection.  Why is a marketer visiting our patients?  Is she trying to stand in as a nurse?  Is she acting as a social worker on behalf of our company?   Is she offering clinical advise to the nursing home staff or giving medicine to the patients?  Absolutely not!  I am just visiting and saying hello.  Offering a piece of kindness while trying to get to know the account better.  Going the extra mile to let the account know that we actually care about our patients and not just to get future referrals, but actually following up to see how our current patients are doing.  This should be a positive, correct?

Well, unfortunately, the person before me in this position, used to go around and act like a nurse and ask the facility to call her instead of our office if there are any problems, concerns or issues.  So, our office manager decides we need to write up a formal "Grievance" to state what my purpose is and what my intentions are for visiting these patients.  I had to sign a formal paper and so did the person accusing me of wrong doing.  Unbelievable!!!  I was so upset I wanted to cry and could not continue to concentrate on my job that morning in the office.

What in the world???  I am actually getting in trouble for being nice?  Has our world gone completely crazy???  How bizarre to have been accused of doing something so right and yet it looked upon as so wrong!!!  Couldn't one person have just asked me:  "Hey Pam, why are you visiting our patients?"  Nope!  Not one person.  My sales manager looked at the operations manager and asked him:  "Do you have a problem with Pam seeing our patients?"  His response was unbelievable.  He said he did not know what my intention was and we needed to set a precedent for this type of behavior so that boundary lines were not crossed in the future.  He was right there in the room with me and acted as if I didn't exist - talking in third party sentences.  Couldn't he have just asked what my intention was a month ago when it was first brought up?  Couldn't the person wondering why I was doing what I was doing just ask me?  Not one of them had the courtesy or decency of asking me what my intentions were.  Not one.

I am completely floored and flabbergasted at the unprofessional handling of this incident.  I had to leave the office that morning as I was so close to tears.  I had to lay it in God's Almighty Hands and ask Him to show me how to  handle my actions and reactions to what just occurred.  Interestingly enough, the Lord came through loud and clear!!!  Two days after signing the paper and putting in our "Grievance Log,"  the person called me late at night to apologize.  She never intended for it to become a grievance and she asked to have it revoked and or just torn up.  The operations manager and clinical practice manager both refused.  The believe we need to keep it on our books for future reference.

Disbelief and discouragement surrounded me...I not only was disappointed that her request was not granted, I was floored.  As I was sitting in a parking lot in Paola, KS reading the follow up email, I literally closed my eyes and prayed to the Lord for His direction.  How in the world should I respond?  Anger?  Disappointment?  Retaliation?  None of the above.  Instead He brought me to an idea that would NOT have been my first reaction!  "Think before you speak."  Whaaat?

THINK is an acronym for:

Is it True?
Is it helpful?
Is it inspiring?
Is it necessary?
Is it kind?

THINK, Pam, THINK!!!
I had just written this acronym down from a poster in one of my accounts that morning.  Perfect timing, don't you think???

So, I wrote this response to the managers and all who were copied on the email:
"Dear so and so,
It is nice to know that doing the right thing because it is the right thing to do brings such notice!  Thank you for the opportunity to grow and learn from this experience."
Smiles, Pam

Yep! Smiles!!!  God gave me an incredible way to handle the situation and disperse all the anger, frustration, resentment and bitterness that was building up in my head and my heart!!!

Lay it down, Pam....Let it go, let it go - just let it go!!!
It is worth letting all the anger and frustration go.
It is worth laying it down and forgiving the person who had a skewed view of my intentions.
It is worth forgiving the managers who needed to make me an example to the rest of the staff.
It is worth giving up my right for retaliation.
It is worth the Peace that passes ALL understanding.
And, it is worth giving God all the Glory for His incredible intervention in my life!!!

How about you?  Would you consider "Thinking before you speak" next time something wild and crazy and very negative happens in your life?  Would you be willing to lay down your anger, disappointment and not become discouraged?

Instead, allow God to show you how to handle the situation.
Allow God to heal your heart and the person who has wronged you.
Ask God to give you His Peace!!!

It is worth it - every step along the way!!!

Take Notice!!!

I have a challenge for us all.  For one month, take notice of the following - one or all of them!!!

1)  WWRT?  What went right today???
2)  Kindness - random acts of kindness - notice them and do them
3)  Acts of Generosity - notice and take part
4)  Profound beauty - notice the amazing sights and sounds around you in creation
5)  What God HAS done for you?
6)  Situations resolved
7)  Positive side
8)  Reflect on God's Sovereignty
9)  Wonders of God
10) I am thankful for ____________

Which one will YOU focus on for the entire month of March???

Blessings abound and surprises await you every single day.........write back what you find!!!

Soup Night Gathering

Soup Night - what a lovely idea!!!  A friend of mine's daughter had a soup night that I went to back in the fall and the idea sparked my interest in gathering some friends at my house.  With the Winter weather creating the doldrums in some people's mind,  I decided to gather a few friends and enjoy a new recipe for Tuscan Bean, Cabbage and Sausage Soup!  (Recipe below.)
It was wonderful - the gathering of some of my favorite people around a table sharing our stories and our laughter was so uplifting and pure fun!!!

Think about the word "gathering" for a minute.  To bring or come together.  To draw about or closer to something (or someone!)  To amass.  To convene, flock, or huddle together.  The birds and geese do it, so why don't we more often???  I know we gather for the holidays, but why not after the holidays?  Why not make it a regular occurrence to gather???  If you haven't had a few friends over in a while, try it!  Soup is simple and easy to fix - you can use your imagination and make whatever you like!  Gather a few friends, add to it a chopped salad and some Ginger ale and/or wine, if you like and enjoy!!!
It is amazing!!!  (Thank you Christine and Rachel for the great idea!!!)

Tuscan Bean, Cabbage & Sausage Soup

2 TBSP. Olive Oil
2 onions, diced
1 (12 ounce) package of Sweet Apple and Gouda Chicken  Sausage (available at Costco)
3 ribs of celery, diced
2 carrots, diced
6 gloves of garlic smashed and/or thinly sliced (I used pre-made minced garlic)
8 cups of Chicken broth
1 cup of dried navy beans, rinsed  (or 1 can of navy beans)
2 bay leaves
1 tsp. dried rosemary
1 tsp. fennel seeds
1 tsp. kosher salt
1/2 tsp. black pepper
1/2 head cabbage, cored and thinly sliced
1 bunch Swiss chard, stems removed and roughly chopped (any greens will work!)
1 TBSP. chopped fresh rosemary

Saute the onions in olive oil and cook/stir about 10 minutes.  Add the sausage and cook/stir 5 minutes.  Add celery and carrots and cook/stir 5 more minutes.  Add the garlic and cook/stir 1 minute.

Add the broth, beans, bay leaves, dried rosemary, fennel seeds, salt, pepper and stir to mix.  Bring the soup to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer (partially covered) or in a crock pot for 1 and 1/2 hours until the beans are tender.

Remove and discard the bay leaves from the soup, Taste for seasoning and add more salt/pepper to take.  Stir in the cabbage and cook until tender about 15 minutes.  Add the Swiss chard and fresh rosemary and simmer until the chard begins to wilt, about 5 more minutes.  Serve warm with big slices of grilled or toasted bread buttered with olive oil and seasoned with sea salt.

ENJOY!!!

The Lessons of Pain and Contentment

As we start a new year, full of possibilities, full of promise, and full of opportunities to grow, change and become all that we are meant to become on this earth, I stand at this new doorway and ponder what will be???

How about you?  How was your 2015?  Did you have a marvelous year or was it spattered with challenges as mine was?  I have never categorized an entire  year as "bad" but if I had, 2015 would be in the running.  One challenge after another seem to appear on the horizon and yet with each new query, I found a lesson of love along with the lesson of pain.  

We all have challenges in this life and in this world.  Some are monumental, others may just be annoying....LOL  

So, in the midst of those challenges, where do you find your strength?  How does one possibly come to a point of contentment despite these delays, disappointments, setbacks, etc.?  I believe it comes from a place deep within us.  And, I believe that it comes from God.  Trust. Thankfulness.  And, from a very human standpoint, learning to accept and simply acknowledgment that life is difficult.  (But, once a person realizes that, it doesn't seem so bad!!!)  Everyone comes across things that way heavy on their soul, their mind, their pocketbook.   Everyone.  Not one of us is spared despite outward appearances.

Some people hide the challenges better than others and some wear them on their sleeves, so to speak.

Some people don't have a clue how to overcome the obstacles that clog up their path.

Some people rely on God for everything.  No matter what.  They trust that things are going to work out for the best.  They believe their needs will be taken care of...not all of their wants, but their true needs.

One scripture that points us in the right direction comes from Paul writing from a dark, cold prison in Philippi.  

Philippians 4:11-13 says:

"For I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.  I know what it is to be in need and I know what it is to have plenty.  I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.  I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

If you were in prison centuries ago, would you be able to say this?  Feel this?  Acknowledge this?  

I am not sure I would be able to do so.  I must admit, we are pretty spoiled here in the USA.  Most of us have all that we need.  Food, shelter, family, friends, a bank account, etc.  Yet, we mistake our wants from our needs and get to complaining that we don't have enough.  Or, it's not the right stuff.

Contentment or pain.  Which brings a person more lessons?  Or, can both???  It is definitely something to contemplate as we embark on a new year!!!  May your days be filled with joy and contentment in 2016.  The kind that truly lasts!!!  

God's Amazing YES!!!

As we start the New Year of 2016, I want to share with you this amazing devotion.  It is meant for each and every one of us!!!  ( used by permission by The Upper Room )

God’s Amazing Yes

(By Gregg Bunn, The Upper Room)

            Every day I stand in need of God’s amazing yes.  God does not look at me and say, “Well, you certainly messed up.  You aren’t the kind of Christian,” or the kind of employee, the kind of student, the kind of parent “that I expected.”  God is not indecisive about whether I am worthy of love.  On the contrary, even in spite of my sinfulness, God say yes to my worth.

            To fallen and sinful people, God continually says yes.  God says yes to people that I have not met.  We might shy away from a homeless person or a starving man in Haiti or a woman dying of AIDS in Uganda or a child who rummages through a landfill searching for clothes.  But to all of these and all of us, God says yes.  All of us are created in God’s image; each one of us is valued and cherished.

            By receiving God’s yes in Jesus Christ, I am able to say yes to others and to myself.  In the dark moments of life when I feel like damaged goods; when I feel I am no longer meeting my or God’s standards and expectations; when I feel lost, lonely, or rejected I know without a doubt that God’s unwavering word to me is yes.  And it is the only answer.

Thought for the day:  Where do you hear God’s amazing yes in your life?

Prayer:  Good and gracious God, thank you for your amazing yes!  Amen.

Prayer Focus:  Those who feel not good enough.

(Taken from the Upper Room by permission)

February 5, 2013

The Candy Cane Story

A friend of mine requested that I share this beautiful story for Christmas, so here it is.  The author is unknown from the piece that I have, so if someone knows the author, please share!!!  I pray you will be blessed by this story, hold it close to your heart and share it with others - the message is profound!!!

"A candy maker wanted to make a candy that would be a witness for his Savior, so he made the Christmas Candy Cane.  He incorporated several symbols for the birth, ministry, and death of Jesus Christ.  He began with a stick of pure white, hard candy.  The white symbolized the Virgin Birth (Isaiah 7:14 and Luke 1:26-35) and the sinless nature of Jesus (I John 3:5).  The hardness of the candy symbolized the Solid Rock (I Corinthians 10:4) the foundation of the Church (Matthew 16:18), and the firmness of the promises of God (Psalm 18:30-32).  The candy maker made the candy into the form of a "J" to represent the precious name of Jesus, who came to earth as our Savior (John 3:16-17), and a symbol to represent the staff of the Good Shepherd (John 10:14).  Thinking that the candy was somewhat plain, the candy maker decided to stain it with three small red stripes, representing the stripes of the scourging Jesus received prior to His crucifixion (Mark 15:15-20) for our healing (Isaiah 53:5).  the large red stripe represents the shedding of His blood on the cross for our salvation (Romans 5:9; Ephesians 1:7)."

One Star, one Child, one Holy Night........the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.  Allow Him to come into your heart tonight.  He came to save us all, not some, not part, not most, but all.  Blessings to you this Glorious Christmas night!!!

So much to ponder for Christmas....

As Christmas approaches this year, I find myself pondering many things, reflecting on the happenings of 2015 and come once again to a point of gratitude.  There is a song in one of my piano Christmas album/music books by Josh Groben called "Thankful."  The words and music are written by Carole Bayer Sager, Daivd Foster and Richard Page.

There is a YouTube version of this beautiful song, if you would like to listen to it.
https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=You+Tube+Josh+Groban+%22Thankful%22+lyrics
 And, here are the lyrics for you:

Some days we forget to look around us;
Some days we can't see the joy that surrounds us.
So caught up inside ourselves,
We take when we should give.

So for tonight, we pray for what we know can be,
And on this day we hope for what we still can't see.
It's up to us to be the change,
And even though we all can still do more,
There's so much to be thankful for.

Look beyond ourselves;
There's so much sorrow,
It's way too late to say,
"I'll cry tomorrow."
Each of us must find our truth,
So long overdue.

So for tonight, we pray for what we know can be,
And on this day we hope for what we still can't see
It's up to us to be the change,
And even though we all can still do more,
There's so much to be thankful for.

Even with our differences,
There is a place we're all connected;
Each of us can find each other's light.

So for tonight, we pray for what we know can be.
And on this day, we hope for what we still can't see.
It's up to us to be the change,
And even though this world needs so much more,
There's so much to be thankful for.

As you listen to or sing the Christmas Carols that are so familiar think about the words - what do they really mean?
Peace on Earth, Good Will toward Men:  Am I bringing peace to someone who may need it?
Angels We Have Heard on High:  Are you listening and watching for the Angelic Chorus that surrounds us?
Joy to the World:  Do you what joy they are singing about?
What Child is This?  Do you know who this child is?  Have you asked Him into your heart?
Silent Night:  Can you feel the awe and reverence that is meant to fill our hearts?

How can you  make a difference in some else's life?  How can you lighten someone's load?  What can
do that will truly impact another human being's life?  Heart?  Soul?
We are not meant to be isolated, self-centered and self-absorbed.  We are meant to carry a message of love and joy and peace to others......what will you do to make a difference this season?

In these next few days before Christmas, take time to do what truly matters.

Pause in the middle of the hustle and bustle and just be still for a moment....

Be grateful for all that you have.....

Spread love, joy and peace to all whom you come in contact with - the warmth that fills your heart is only a tiny portion of what love can do for someone else who may be hurting this season.

Remember the reason for the season:
Come adore on bended knee
Christ the Lord, the newborn King.
The King of King - salvation brings.
Let loving hearts enthrone Him.
Christ came to save us from our sins.
Christ came to bring us JOY.  

So for tonight,
May your heart be filled to overflowing with that JOY and
Spread that JOY wherever you go!!!

Merry, Merry Christmas!!!