Cathartic healing.....

Cathartic.....ever consider this type of healing?

Well, it's a big word for a a thought-provoking conversation and/or process of healing.
If you google it, the definition is:  Providing psychological relief through the open expression of strong emotions, causing catharsis.

Have you ever thought you have healed a past hurt and then realized there were (or are) more layers of healing needed???  Well, I just found that out this past weekend!  While spending time with a friend from high school and talking about our lives and the separate paths we took between high school and today, I came across quite a rude awakening!  Areas that I thought were completely healed came to the surface.  And, in some ways, they came back with a vengeance!  Like I said, I thought I had let them go and was pretty proud that I had prayed, spent time writing my feelings out in a journal, gone to counseling, etc. etc. etc. to heal those hurts.  And yet, in discussing some of those old wounds, it became very clear that I had not laid them to rest 100%. 

Now, will those hurts ever be healed 100%?  I honestly do not have that answer.  But, I do know that being able to work through the old feelings of bitterness, anger and/or resentment of the past, gave me a new level of relief as I openly expressed my side of the story!!!  Wow......how in the world had some of the anger settled in my heart?  How could that resentment re-surface? Bitterness?  Surely not!  And, yet, my friend heard it loud and clear!!!  It took me by surprise.....

Healing, wholeness, psychological relief, and strong emotions.....it's quite a mix!!!

Yes, we all have times or experiences when something is so disturbing that we have a hard time sleeping, or we go through a time a depression and grief.  But, have you considered that what you went through was truly a trauma in your life?  Stop for a moment and consider the possibility that you haven't completely healed yet....and then, consider going through a cathartic experience to bring about another layer of healing for your heart, mind and soul.

We are complex as human beings.  And, sometimes, we become a human "doing!"  We continue going through the motions and believe we are addressing the issues, and boom!  We find out, no we have not gotten it all out yet....if you have something traumatic in your past, consider going a little deeper to heal.  Be gentle with yourself and try again.  Feel the feelings and allow them to surface.  Remember, they are just feelings - you don't have to act on those feelings.  Just feel them.  Then, deal with how you feel about it again.  Seek some wise counsel or share with a friend who knows you and cares enough to listen.  Then, allow yourself to heal....again and again..........whether it's five minutes or five years, or perhaps twenty five years - allow your heart to let it go once again.  Simply acknowledge that it happened.  And, that you do NOT have to live it again!  You just need to heal.
Feel, deal, heal.........it's a wonderful gift to yourself!!!

Once You Find A Friend.....

This week was a very emotional week for me........one of my neighbors and dear friends for the past 18 years, Nancy passed away from cancer.  Thud!  I hate cancer!!!  It seems to be everywhere and each of us have many people fighting for their lives while battling this terrible disease, so I am not looking for a pity-party, just wanted to share how wonderful Nancy's friendship was.....

I met Nancy 18 years ago when I moved into my little house in Old Shawnee.  We shared the same address, but a different street across the pond, so we go each other's mail.  That is how we met!  Giving each other our mail.  That was so much fun and a friendship began.

Nancy LOVED coffee - I don't mean LIKED coffee, she LOVED it!!!  She only had Organic everything, so each time we shared a cup of coffee, it was special.  Not only from the taste of the coffee standpoint, but her friendship.  Just like me, Nancy was quirky!  She was much more of a fanatic about her organic this and that ( which I am NOT fanatical about at all - Ha! Ha!), but she loved life and we hit it off from the beginning!!!

Nancy was a die-hard "Rebel without a Cause" kind of girl!  I mean stubborn as all get out and rebellious beyond imagination in her early 1970 years!  She was not born deaf, but literally became deaf from listening to so many years of Rock and Roll in Lawrence, KS.  Yes, that's right, she was a Rock-Chalk Jayhawk through and through!!!  She loved music!!!  One of her favorite pastimes was the Crumpletons band - especially when they played at the KU Oriad bar and she loved to dance!!! And, she loved to go to Knuckleheads in downtown KC to listen to music as well.  She even took her 90 year old dad there!!!  He loved it as they were "Pals" and went everywhere together - they were a hoot!!!

The first time I went with Nancy to Knuckleheads, the music was so loud I had to go outside!!!  Nancy stayed in doors with her hearing aids up at full blast!!!  It was hilarious!!!

We share "soup night" once a month at my house and just chatted away about this and that and enjoyed each other's company.  Oh, how I would give a million bucks to have one more cup of coffee with her, one more soup night or one more night to listen to LOUD music with her.........I miss her tremendously.

Nancy shared with me the ugly cancer news sometime in May or June, so we started hanging out a bit more.  Then, she got really sick - 911 sick - and was taken to KU Medical center.  I honestly thought that would be it, but she revived!  She then ventured to Lakeview Village to their Skilled Nursing Facility and really rallied over the 4th of July.  I had the privilege of taking care of Moses, her beloved Golden Retriever.  We had to keep him calm during the Fireworks as Nancy was really concerned he would freak out.  He did great!  Then, after she came back  great from rehab, she returned home and the cancer continued to return with a venegence.  She had Breast Cancer 5 years ago and thought she beat it, but it reared it's ugly head again in April.  Went to her bones, liver, lungs and eventually her brain.  She was remarkable about her attitude during every phase.  She get adament telling ALL of us that God was going to heal her!!!  When, she first got home form Lakeview, I believed her!  She was doing SO well......

In June, I told her I was going to start sending her scriptures written out on index cards, so she could read them.  I just found one of them in her journal from June 18 and it had Psalm 28:7 on it which says:  "The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and I am helped.  My heart leaps for JOY and I will give thanks to Him in song."

When, I found the card this week after she was "Promoted to Heaven," I found that she had written something on the back of the card which said:

"Once you find a friend, you've come home.  They come visit me in my prayers and thoughts.  Joy are the echoes of good life within us."  

She and I had both "come home" together in our friendship.....it was truly a blessing to be by her side for the last 5 weeks and especially that last 5 days.  Her sister, Meg, her two nieces Sara and Emily and their hubbies Collins and John, her cousin Susan and her husband Dan, her brother-in-law Ken and his wife Charlene and her dear friend and Vet, Jeanie were by her side, too.  We had an amazing night of prayer and listened to the song "I Can Only Imagine" by MercyMe that last night.  Meg laid on one side of the bed with Nancy and each of her nieces rotated laying on the other side of her as we talked and prayed and laughed about all the adventures we had shared with this wonderful sister, aunt, cousin, sister-in-law and friend she had been to each of us.

"Once you find a friend, you've come home."  Ahhhh.....I found that friend in Nancy and I believe she found me.  She even kept telling people that I moved back from Ohio this year just for her!!!  It was amazing to have that privilege of being with her.

And, now, she is home....she is with the Lord Jesus Christ in Paradise.  The true Heaven.

Home at last....

Revelation 21:4 says:  "He will wipe every tear from their eyes.  there will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."

My prayer is that you have a friend that you feel you have come home to....and that you have accepted Jesus Christ into your heart where home truly is........He is there waiting for each of us to make that choice.  He won't force us to believe in Him. He stands at the door and knocks.  I pray you will open that door!!!

One final note.  I have a beautiful Native American Indian card that says it perfectly:

"Peace at last....when my body lies without a song....my spirit and the eagles will soar together."

Soar Nancy, SOAR!!!!